“And I’m thinking about a woman
Who I would put no one above
I’m not looking to replace her
Just need someone to love.”
Sister: Who's your favourite Twilight Character?
Me: Sorry, you must be new. I don't actually give a shit about Twilight. Read the books, watched the movies, but I hate them. They're bad role-models for preteens like you and feed you with negative stuff about relationships. I'm actually a big fan of Harry Potter. You know, the amazing series about life and wizards and heroism and good and evil and it's funny and wonderful and like fire and ice.
Sister: ROBERT PATTINSON IS IN HARRY POTTER THO
Me: Cedric was great. he was the nicest person in the books, in my opinion. Hey, did you know that Roberrt Pattinson slanders the Twilight books? Often? All over Tumblr.
Sister: What's Tumblr?
Me: THAT'S IT GTFO BITCH
You’re gonna go through life thinking that girls don’t like you because you’re a nerd, and I want you to know, from the bottom of my heart, that that won’t be true. It’ll be because you’re an asshole.